Today, I reached out to Perez Hilton, the famous celebrity blogger whose known for outing gay celebrities on his website which he thinks is just fabulous, call it divine intervention, if you believe that Jesus was a closeted homosexual who believes in liberating celebrities so they can love thy neighbor without having to hide it or live in perpetual shame. So I send an email to Pez, telling him that I liked his book and that the pictures were great, it was the best I can do, I read through it at Barnes Noble by the time I finished my espresso. By the way; Perez is openly gay and originally from Cuba, so that must make him the pitcher in the relationship, considering the country’s reputation for churning out such great major league pitchers like former Yankee great, El Duke. And I’m sure he knows a thing or two about spit balls, that will be the last gay joke, I promise, Senior Hilton won’t mind and neither should you, the man is a shameless horror, his website is bright pink for Christ’s sake, not that I have anything against pink, I wear it well myself.
The point here is that I contacted Perez so he could read my blog on Mickey Rourke, figuring that he would love it because it’s a funny piece about Hollywood, then, he would direct thousands of his followers in my direction because his recommendations carry some weight in social media circles. But before I said, hey Perez read my blog about Mickey Rourke breaking the golden globes curse, I threw him a compliment which was sincere; the book really has some great pictures. That’s how this blogging game works; you stroke blogger egos by commenting on how great their blogs are so they can check out yours and recommend it their friends, which will spark one giant blog off. Writing positive comments is hard to do because there’s usually not much to work with, but that’s the price of admission if you want to play ball. The idea is, I scratch your back if you scratch mine, but you if write something unflattering and make a digital heckle, they’ll delete you forever, it’s all very grown up don’t you think? My blog get’s no comments, that’s why I’m trying to connect with celebrity bloggers like Perez so he direct his fan base my way, he really does bring out the social climbing diva in all of us. With that said, I understand the importance of leaving comments but writing one that’s false, for the sake of more readers, so you can latch onto his crowd is shallow, desperate and gay as far as parasites go. When my blog get’s off the ground, I will try not to invest too much into comments because most of them are made by gun shy kids who confuse brain farts with writing worth reading.
So for all of those that want to start a blog and impose your opinions on the world, you need to make comments first and lots of them. I can’t say that I’m excited about the project either. But first, write some blogs, so you’ll have something to reference while you circle jerk the blogosphere to its knees. You can’t get into the upper echelon of blogging circles without an endless amount of brownnosing, praising and gazing at other people’s blogs as nauseating as it sounds. Don’t think you can just cut in front of the line, and get buy on your good looks alone, I mean how many of us have a body built like Tila Tequila. They might check you out by the door, but they won’t let you into their world of bookmarking, linking and blogging to people more connected than you unless you’re willing to satisfy their two comment minimum, who knows maybe one day you’ll compliment me. In the meantime, I won’t hold my breath.
Written by,
Josh Kornbluth
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